Impossible Beauty

There are two things that you should know about the rain forest. One, that it rains and two that it's a forest.

Oh, and there's a third thing - it's full of bugs. Bugs that have an insatiable  appetite for human blood. In particular my blood. They really are little bleeders. Quite literally. If you let your guard down for moment they're in there, filling up on four star homosapien. 

It doesn't take much - maybe you forgot to close the window or missed a square inch of skin with the inspect repellant. What you should absolutely not do under any circumstances is drive for nearly six hours with several if then trapped in your car. It gives a whole new meaning to the phrase 'meals on wheels'.

And it's not the itching that the worst thing - a few glasses of wine and you soon forget about it. No, it's the polka dot appearance of your wounded appendages. After a few days in the rain forest my legs look like they're part of a grizzly dot-to-dot puzzle. It's quite frankly embarrassing - when we went to the pool yesterday I was getting quizzical looks from fellow bathers, some giving me a wide berth believing that I had a tropical disease. Which I had - it's those bloody bugs.

But having said that, they're nowhere near as bad as the Scottish Midge. The Scottish Midge has perfected the art if being annoying. It's Kiwi counterpart is less troublesome but with a nasty nip. Mankind can only hope that they never meet and pass on tips to each other.

The 350km drive from Franz Josef to Queenstown took quite a while but it was so scenic but we were in no rush. Which was fortunate as it would be impossible to rush the journey. Or you would do so at your own peril as the road hugged precipitous cliffs, cross cavernous gillis and traversed hundreds of creeks. And I mean hundreds. Some had quite romantic names such as Whispering Creek and Tubmbling Creek, whilst others had  more natural sounding names; Trickle Creek, Blackwater Creek and Hairpin Creek. Then there were those named after people; Ben Creek, Joe Creek and Peter Creek. By the time they started naming them after medical illnesses, such as Gout Creek, they had clearly ran out of ideas and were getting desperate. I was half expecting to cross Headache Creek and perhaps Well It's Never Been The Same Since I Had That Fall Creek. 

But it was a stunning journey - probably one of the most, if not the most picturesque I have been on. I know at least one driving instructor who would have insisted in driving, as long as Simple Minds was on the car stereo. 

Vibrant blue lakes gave way to lush verdant forests. Snow capped mountain tops peeked from behind rolling green hills. New Zealand is a country of impossible beauty. 

Eventually we arrived into Queenstown which even at the early time of 2pm was gearing up for a storming New Year's Eve party. People were already spilling out of the bars and some were even on their second kebab of the 'night'. The town had it's glad rags on and was raring to go. Oh my god, what have we done!

To be continued.....